My Orbit
by theorize
Summary: Judes back with all the goods. one shot
1. Chapter 1

**Hmm...okay. First things firt, the dreaded disclaimer.**

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Instant Star or anything that goes along with it!_**

**Now, I'm new here. This is my first story. It's in Judes POV. Umm.. I hope you like it.**

**- Sam

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Have you ever wondered what your life would be like if you had made different choices? Be honest. If in the past you chose a different road than the one your currently stuck on? I know I probably sound completely loony right now. But lately all the "What If's?" and "How Come's?" have been nagging at my brain. I keep thinking that if I hadn't won the Instant Star competition how different my life would be right now. I wouldn't need to cover up my face every time I went out to grab a cup of coffee with my best friend. Maybe my parents would still be together. God knows their divorce was mainly because of the stress my career put on them. I might be working in a pawn shop, selling used instruments. Or, stocking toilet paper at some grocery store near by.

Then again, here's another thought. How has my life changed since I accepted G-Majors recording contract two years ago? Well, for starters, I wouldn't have gotten the opportunity to express my music to the world. That's the greatest gift the studio has blessed me with. To be able to make music my way, with my emotions and fears thrown in, is simply electrifying. Music is the course I take to letting people know what's real. If that was taken away from me, I think I'd be miserable. Without my music, I am nothing.

An added bonus to my contract was meeting Tommy. Oh boy, Tommy. The name speaks for itself. To me anyways. He's very complicated. He's always been their though when I needed him, so I guess that makes up for all the confusion he leaves embedded into my brain. When I was first told he was going to be my producer my first thought was, "Hell no!" That sounds really rude but it's the truth. A '90's boy bander producing my music? It was scary at the time. To be completely honest, I didn't think my music was worth him producing. I was very wrong.

He changed my music for the better. Heck, he changed me for the better. Without him I wouldn't have experienced certain things that I've made memories of. Tommy's like a dictionary. He's filled with tons of useful information but then again his thick-headed alter ego can aggravate the crap out of me. It's surprising how along the way I developed strong feelings for him. Considering we both bicker constantly. The love-hate relationship is mutual. I still don't know what feelings he has for me, if any. Sure we've kissed a few times and thought of each other in ways that are highly inappropriate but is that really love?

Oh my goodness. The idea that I could even be in love with the man is insane! He's mulish, a starving perfectionist, high maintenance, moody, and occasionally brooding. Most of all the things I am not. I couldn't be farther from perfect if you threw me into a Broadway choir. I can't stand cleaning, just look at my room. And I'm not mulish at all. Okay, wait, forget I said that. I'm a very stubborn person, I admit it. That's one thing we have in common. Besides music. The fact that he drives me crazy doesn't count in all of this.

When were sitting in the studio and he does that little half groan half sigh thing... I can't really think when he does that. I don't know why. Or, when he's reaching for something and his arm muscles flex. You do not want to be a witness to that, lemme tell ya. He's got this sexy way of being an ass. That was the biggest oxymoron. I loathe the amount of control he has over me. It makes me feel as if I don't have any over him. Sadie says I need more sex appeal. Is she loco? I have about as much sex appeal as my great Aunt Daphne! I think she's 54...

Skipping the subject of Tommy for a sec. Let's talk about my sister. Everyone knows Sadie is the queen of all things and everything. These days she's been especially nice and helpful. I'm wondering if college life has reduced the size of her brain. She knows how I feel about Tommy and amazingly she's not mad or jealous for once. She had her chance. Whenever I come to her to talk about "You know who" she's always willing to give me advice. I'm only 17, so I don't even know why I try. Or why she tries. But at least Sades isn't the over-achieving snob she used to be.

Anyway, back to Tommy. As I was saying, I hate the hold he has on me. It's like I'm trapped in a weirdo force field of energy and I can't break the walls (strange analogy). Sometimes I feel like I have no control. I can't control anything in my life except my music, my eating and sleeping habits, and how much espresso I drink a day. Pretty sad, huh?

Everyone has their good days and bad days. I'm just cursed with having more bad than good. Today, for example. I woke up to a house full of a total of two people and no Cocoa Pebbles in the pantry.

" Jude! Gary's here. He's taking me out for breakfast. I'll be home within the next two hours. Don't forget to get your clothes out of the drier! " I heard my mom yelling from the upstairs. I hated Sundays. Sundays were cleaning days. Not to mention Sundays suck because that just means tomorrows Monday. And Mondays are even worse than Sundays.

I stumbled into the kitchen and found Sadie reading the daily newspaper. She never used to read that and she never used to sit with her back so straight at the kitchen table. I personally think she just wants to look more intelligent than she really is. Maybe she should get some fake glasses and go for the whole librarian appearance.

After rummaging through the fridge, cabinets, and pantry I finally settled on a Frosted S'Mores pop tart and some Milk. " Watcha reading? " I asked her, sitting down in the chair across from her and trying to open my pop tart. She set the paper down in front of her. " Oh, nothing. " she said.

I nodded. God damn. Why does ' Kellogg ' have to make their wrappers so difficult! Six year olds eat pop tarts. If I couldn't open it, then how would they. That was a rhetorical question. It's the same with those fruit rollups. I can't ever get the plastic off the actual rollup. Not that I eat those or anything...

" Need some help? " Sadie asked, eyeing me like I was a Squirrel trying to bury a nut. Better question, " When don't I need help? " I didn't say that out loud of course. I simply tossed the thing over to her and watched as she magically sliced the shiny, aluminum foil off my morning breakfast.

Sadie has always been better at doing something than I have. I mean _always. _Just like that old song on the Gatorade commercials ( I think it was Gatorade..). The " I can do anything better than you can. I can do anything better than you! " That song screams me and my sister. But so does ' People Are Strange ' by The Doors. When we were younger, it was all about Sadie. She was the princess and I was the partisan who catered to her. Childhood bites. Especially if you have siblings.

" Thanks " I muttered, as I broke off a piece and popped it into my mouth. Mmmm... I love me some Chocolaty goodness. For some odd reason my mouth was really dry. The milk just made it worse. So did the pop tart but you can bet I'm not going to give that up. I'm guessing it's just the whole yucky morning mouth. I'll be fine after I brush my teeth and use some mouthwash.

As I was breaking off another chunk, I glanced over and saw Tommy standing in the doorway. It wasn't a hallucination either. He was just standing their. " Oh, hey Tom. " Sadie said casually, getting up and making her way to the fridge. What was this? He didn't have a key to our house. Mom always unlocked the front door in the morning but that's not a welcome for people just to walk right in. Tommy's no exception.

" Whafz ee djoin her? " I asked, my mouth obviously stuffed with a mixture of Chocolate and Milk. I hope I didn't spit.

" I told him he could come in whenever the doors open. " Sadie replied. She poured herself a glass of Orange Juice, took a drink, then wiped her mouth with a paper towel. I watched her. I know Tom's not a stranger but if she's going to do that then why not just alert the whole friggen' neighborhood! I feel a lot safer knowing we had that alarm system thing put in last Summer.

" Um, okay. " I said, sounding a bit distant. I'm in my pajamas. And it's 10:00 in the morning. This is what every girl wants, right? To be sitting in her kitchen, with her sister, who dated her producer, who is also in the room, who I happen to be crushing on, might possibly love, who is just standing their like he's paralyzed, not saying anything like a mute, while I continue to awkwardly eat.

" Morning " Tommy said. He speaks! He shuffled his way to our island and grabbed an apple. Cleaning it before biting into it. Maybe I shouldn't be so touchy on the fact that he just waltzed right into our house and took one of our apples. I mean, Jaime does it. Jaime comes into our house just to use the bathroom. Seriously. He comes in, does his business, then leaves. Sometimes he says hi, sometimes he doesn't.

I tossed the issue aside. " Why'd you come here? It's Sunday. I don't have to go to the studio today. " I was using my tongue to try to get something out of my teeth. It probably didn't look very pleasant but I don't care.

He shook his head. That better not mean I have to go to the studio today. I refuse. " No. You don't have to go to the studio today. " He said. I sighed with relief. It's not like I was going to go even If I had to. Like I said, It's Sunday. It's against the law in my book to go to work on Sunday. " But you do have some charity work you need to do. " he finished. Dammit! " We need to do. " he corrected himself.

I pouted, I wanted to cry, I was being selfish. I crossed my arms over my chest and tucked one leg under the other on the wooden kitchen chair. " What? Why? " I whined.

I had already gone to the childrens hospital, fed the homeless, and picked up trash around the city. What else left was their? Don't get me wrong. I love kids and I love doing whatever I can to help people in need but this...This was getting old. Today would have been the perfect day to go to a carnival or something. Evidently I won't be doing anything fun or relaxing.

" What are we doing? " I asked, ready for the worst. Come on. Hit me with your best shot Tom Quincy.

Tommy threw his half eaten apple away. Oh, now he's wasting our food. What if we were on an apple shortage! " Animal Shelter. " he said. All he said. Hmm...ok. Animals I can handle. For the most part. We've had Rozzy ( our family dog ) for almost seven years.

" Dogs I can handle. " I looked up at him from my seated position and gave him a quirky smile. He returned it with one of equal evilness. " Not just Dogs. " He patted me playfully on the head. He walked to the doorway, placed his sunglasses over his eyes, turned, and said, " Go get dressed. Were leaving in about Ten minutes. Nice seeing you, Sadie. " Then he walked out the front door towards his car.

" What did he mean ' Not just Dogs '? " I asked cautiously. If I had to touch a spider, or any bug, or feed a live rat to a snake, I would hurl. No, I'd probably drop to the floor. Never been good with bugs.

Sadie shrugged. " I guess you're going to find out. You better go get dressed. You only have.. " she looked at her crystal embroidered watch, " Seven minutes. "

I felt like sucker punching something. My plan for the day was staying home, staying in the p.j.'s, watching the Will and Grace marathon on Lifetime, and indulging in a gallon of Cookie Dough Ice Cream. Not, having to get dressed, being forced to spend the day at an Animal Shelter, and come home smelling like a zoo. I love my venting period.

I unfolded my legs quickly and accidentally fell to the ground, face forward. Tommy would leave me if I wasn't ready. I bounced back up, with no scratches or bruises I might add, and flew up the stairs. ' What does a person wear to an Animal Shelter? ' I mentally asked myself. I heard Tommy honking and knew time wasn't on my side. I grabbed the cleanest thing I could find, threw it on, and ran back down the stairs. I waved bye to Sadie on my way and once outside, practically catapulted myself into the Viper.


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note: Ok, heres the deal. My friend is taking over this story but I'll still post the updates. Enjoy!

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I never realized how many animals get treated so badly. I'm sure it's not accidental either. People discard them like there nothing. Maybe they can't pay for food or vet bills, but I don't think that's a good excuse. Animals have feelings to. They need to eat and have shelter to survive just like us humans. It just disgusts me to see animals treated so cruelly. I might become a animal rights activist someday. That is if my music career sinks. It doesn't look like it's going in that direction anytime soon, but if it does, I have a backup plan.

"What's with the.." Tommy paused and studied my neck. "Plastic pendant?" he asked, obviously talking about the piece of jewelry I had chosen to wear. He picked it up, looked at it, then me, and laid it back down on my chest. Hands Mr. Quincy. Watch the hands.

For starters, it wasn't plastic. The dumbass. Second, it was the nearest thing I could find in my room to make my outfit look..unique. I'm a diverse person. This "pendant" brought a whole new meaning to the word funky. I looked down at my skirt. It had Purple and Black stripes running diagonally. At one point I found my head starting to tilt. It was paired with a plain, faded Yellow tank top. Mismatching is what I do best. Plus, it was either the Yellow one or a Cabbage Patch Kids t-shirt from grade Six. On my wrist was my favorite Orange bangle. Chunky style!

"I spent Twenty minutes on the phone last night with my little cousin, long distance I might add, listening to him breath while his mom was in the background yelling 'Say hi! Say hi!', Tommy. I wasted my weekend minutes on the sound of loud panting. So, if you want to discuss my sense of style, you can check back tomorrow when I'm not so touchy and I have a few cups of coffee in me." I said confidently. Everything sort of came out as a huge clash of noises.

Oh, I'm never having kids.

The shelter actually wasn't that bad. Or bad smelling. There were cages and cages of dogs locked up, rooms with random animals (pigs, INSECTS, cats, etc), and they had a huge field in the back with the greenest grass I've ever seen. It's most likely generic. That's another thing I don't get. Why paint your grass Green when you can just let it change colors normally? Fall is right around the corner.

One animal caught my attention though. A huge Golden Retriever Lab mix named Moose. Tommy and him would get along just fine. Tom can't live without Mousse, Hairspray, or Gel. "Where'd you find this one?" I asked, pointing to the cage and walking over to it cautiously. I held out my hand slowly and let him (it was a him, I observed) rub against it. His hair was surprisingly soft.

"Oh him." the man standing beside Tommy said gloomily. His name was apparently John. That's what his little nametag said. "We found him over in the street by Snide Blvd. He's been here about.. around Three months. Nobody wants 'em. Were going to have to..." he stopped to use his pointer finger as a visual as he demonstrated shooting something up his arm. "Soon." he finished with emphasis.

I unconsciencly gasped, still rubbing around the dogs ears. They were going to kill him. I've read about stuff like this in the paper. When a dog in a shelter doesn't find a home within a limited amount of time, they get rid of it. They have to keep the "space" open for the next abandon animal. For some reason, I couldn't let it happen. I didn't want to leave knowing I was leaving behind something that was going to die within the next week.

Tommy was staring at me with an almost admiring gaze. It semi freaked me out. "Can I buy him? Or... adopt?" I asked. Moose didn't look harmful! I'm sure if I brought him home and explained the circumstances to Sades and mom about why I had to take him they would be totally fine with it. Maybe. Rozzy could just get over it.

"Well yes.. But--" John began. I didn't even let him get any further. "I'll take him!" I exclaimed, smiling happily. "Uh, Jude I think you need those couple cups of coffee in you before you make such a drastic decision. You don't want to rush into something then ruin it." Tommy spoke up from the other side of the room. "Including my car.." he said quietly. I heard you!

He doesn't have any feelings, I swear. Here we are talking about an animal who is going to be killed and he is worried about his Viper. Typical. I can't love him. I couldn't possibly love someone who doesn't care about anyone or anything other than himself. Say a few years from now, were married. Whoa! Brain tweak. I didn't just refer me to being married to him did I? Shutting up, now.

"I'll take him." I said sternly, directing the statement to John. He shrugged, came over to open the cage, put a leash on Moose, and walked towards a desk sitting in the right corner of the room. As I fallowed him, I walked right past Tom. Turning to face him, I mouthed, "Don't worry." My eyes big with sincerity. I'm not sure if I was reassuring him or myself that everything was going to be fine. I basically just bought a big ass dog without the permission of my mom. I need to learn to think before I speak. Major.

Then again, I am Seventeen. Eighteen in Four months. I'm sure as hell authorized to make responsible decisions. I'm practically an adult. I've kissed Tom Three times and had a full on make-out with him once. Ok, the first kiss was all me. The second was definitely him. The third was mutual. And as for the make-out.. It wasn't really planned per say. We were in the studio, it was late, and we were both passionately horny! That was a joke. We just got caught up in the moment. That seems to be happening a lot...

It took about Ten minutes to seal the deal. Then we were out the door. Leash in hand. This dog is not just sweet, soft, and adorable. He's also turbo! Once out the door, he pulled me all the way to the other side of the street, up the block, then back again. The whole time, Tommy was laughing like an idiot.

"A little help!" I yelled, flying past him. Holy jumpin jaheebas! My arm is being dislocated from it's socket that's for sure. Moose practically rammed into my leg. That ones gonna leave a bruise. As I ran past Tom for the...oh.. Ninth? time, he grabbed me by the waste and pulled me back. Roughly. I let go of Mooses leash and he took off. Unfortunately, I was more focused on the fact that I had just been pulled on top of Tommy and we were laying there looking like complete losers.

I'm not going to lie. I liked it. I liked it a lot. This is something I have dreamed about. Literally. Only in my dream he was shirtless and had body oil all over his chest. My breathing was heavy, as was his. I wanted to kiss him so bad. It wasn't until after I leveled out my breathing and squeezed my eyes shut tight that I noticed his hands were holding me by the hips. One was running up my back to. Like that's discreet!

His hands were so smooth. I felt them reach my neck and begin to massage it. This is the "caught up in the moment" thing I've been telling you about. And it happens way to often.

"You know, other people are in this park. Your just another couple who needs to keep there private life, private!" an old granny snapped at us from above. This is just simply magical. I looked up at her and gulped. "Oh!" I exclaimed, getting off of him and springing into the air. "I'm sorry." I apologized, smoothing out my clothes. Tom suddenly appeared by my side.

Utter humiliation is a funny thing, huh? We always have little moments in the most random places. Something about timing. I was never good at telling time actually. I almost failed the First grade because I would constantly go around asking my classmates for the answers to the daily "Time Seeker" brain teaser. I wonder if Ms. Vizcarra ever retired.

Back on topic! "You Two seem very happy together, but there are children here dear." the woman continued to scold us. Talk about dejavu. I felt like I was Seven years old again and getting punished for cutting Sadies hair while she was asleep. Geesh. "Yes mam." I nodded respectfully. I noticed how Toms lips were pursed and he was trying extremely hard not to laugh. To tell you the truth, so was I.

The woman nodded once and then turned. "Were not together." I called out, motioning between me and Tommy. She looked back. "Me and him. Were not a...couple." I said slowly. A mischievous smile played upon her thin lips. "Right, honey." she winked. My face scrunched. Shocked much?


	3. Chapter 3

The rest of the day went on rather boringly. Moose trashed Toms Full Grain Leather interior. I thought it was pretty funny. It's not like he doesn't have enough money from shaking his boybander ass to fix it. We showed up at my house to find Sadie gone, and a note from my mom. Here we go again. Treating me like I'm Five. One of these days I'll show them that I'm not Fifteen anymore. And that I'm not a kid.

_Jude,   
Came home to find your laundry still stuffed in the dryer. I took it out and put it in a laundry basket. It's in the living room. I'm not sure when I'll be home. There's leftover Chicken Casserole in the refrigerator. See you soon!_

Mom 

Gary Stickle. The new guy mom snatched out of "Bills Grill...And Bar". She's turned into quite the little tease lately. I'm not trying to show any disrespect to her either. I meet a new boyfriend every...oh..week or so (no pun intended). Theres been talk about marriage with her new one but you can sure as hell bet I'm not taking the name 'Jude Stickle' (no pun intended). It makes me sound like a slutty soap opera star whose name should be Ivana (pun intended). 

And what's with the Chicken Casserole? She knows I hate it but she continues to make it. It was probably a frozen TV dinner thing. I'll feed it to Tommy.

"You can..uh..sit down." I said, as we entered the house. Things had become extremely awkward after the whole park incident. He wouldn't even look at me. I couldn't decide if he was embarrassed, angry, or just irritated. Knowing him, like I do, it's normal to bare witness to his unfriendly mood swings. He reminds me of Sadie when she's on the rag. That's the most terrible time of the month around here. When Sadies 'started', grab a Coke, a Granola Bar, and barricade yourself under your bed! Maybe Tommys bipolar?..

I noticed the clothes my mom was talking about sitting in the basket on the coffee table. My Ramones T-shirt, Two pairs of jeans, tons of socks, and a thong. If I remember correctly, that's about what I put in my hamper. Erm! Backup. At second glance I realized my "under garments" were stock right on top of the pile of clean clothes. Dammit. I'm like the friggen' Obi Wan of humiliation.

I don't think he noticed. Oh wait...wait...he did. Tommy raised an eyebrow and actually sat up straighter. The moment he turned to look at me, I knew what he was going to say. This is why I took action. In 4.3 milliseconds I had dodged over to that table, sat on the basket, and rambled about how stupid Sadie was to leave crap like that around.

Tossing the basket away. And I mean far away, I took a seat next to him. Quietness. I hate the word quiet. It should mean death. I can't stay silent and I can't stand silence. Am I a complicated person, or what! Sitting next to him then, a really weird sensation came over me. Not like that you pervs. I felt..sad. Tommy and I used to be friends. We used to go to concerts and have lunch together. We used to throw those little chocolate covered gummy bears at people when we went and saw movies. You'd think he was to mature to do something like that. He's not.

Ever since I turned Seventeen we've been drifting I guess. I missed calling him at Two in the morning when I had writers block. I missed jumping on his back when I was bored and there was nothing to do in the studio. I missed spending time with him. As friends. Everythings been so complicated! "Do you want me?" or "Why don't you want me?" are stupid questions. If I had to choose between having Tommy in my life as just a friend and not a lover opposed to not having him at all.. I'd choose numero uno. 

"Hey Tom--" I began. He looked into my eyes with that look. I can't describe it exactly. I just call it 'The look'. "What's going on between us?" I asked. I didn't want him to take it as what's going on romantically with us. I should have specified. "I mean, why don't we hang out anymore?"

He grabbed my legs and laid them over his lap, smiling the whole time. He wasn't making a move. "Honestly.. I really don't know, Jude." he replied. My legs were surprisingly soar and the gash Moose had given me earlier was now a light shade of purple. Tommy gently rubbed his thumb over it. It was actually very soothing.

I smiled. His answer just didn't satisfy me. But then again, what does? I don't ask for much. I'll blame genetics. "Do you remember that time we were in Stans Grocery Store and my shoe got stuck in the frozen meat bin?" I laughed. That was an experience! Apparently rubber can freeze against plastic. Who would have thunk it! He laughed softly. "Yeah. What about the time you got stuck in the turnstile at Home Depot? The firemen had to come. I was there for Three hours waiting on you to be set free!" he exclaimed.

The thing is, I can't be tamed. I'm a wild child. I threw a pillow at him. "And you sacrificed for me because you love me, Quincy." I teased. Weird thing about me saying that is I actually started to believe in it.

Love: (1) Strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties maternal love for a child (2) : attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests love for his old schoolmates b : an assurance of love give her my love   
2 : warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion love of the sea 

That the definition of it given by good old Webster. But to me, love is different. Once you know you're in love, nothing should matter. Disability, Gender, Religion, Age! It's all bull. If you truly love someone, there's nothing else to worry about. That's how I feel when I'm with Tommy. Like I don't have a care in the world.

He was laughing slightly when he responded. "Yeah.. Maybe I do." he said warmly. Oh, now I remember why we stopped hanging out. Uncontrollable feelings might have something to do with it! I was just sitting there. Looking at him. Into his eyes. There such beautiful eyes. Like the ocean. Or the sky! Every time I got lost.

"Hello!" Anyone here?" we both heard my sisters obnoxious voice from the doorway. I swung my legs around just as she was walking into the room. "There you are! Listen, I need to talk to you, Jude. It's important!" Sadie huffed in a busybody tone.

Sadie only huffed when it was a dire emergency. I realized it was something big, so I sadly let Tommy get up and leave. Much to my dismay. And it sucked because I lost my footstool. "What is it, Sadie?" I asked, my hands on my hips, and already missing the warmth Tommy's body had been giving mine just moments before.


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